Dear 53%,

Why are you proud of working extra hard to get nowhere in life? You don't need to ask the government for handouts, but you've got to realize there's a giant, invisible thumb eternally pushing you into the ground.

Wake up. Fight back. Question everything and reject oppression.

Stop being proud of accomplishing nothing. Be proud when you actually accomplish something.

Don't sell yourselves into serfdom.

Sincerely,
A Member of the 53%

How To Work A Job

1) If at such time as any or most, you could find yourself pondering the care of the baby or a food, you must first consider the advent of the job. With the occurrence of the job you can sacrifice useful chunks of life to gain money for an employment officer in charge, commonly known to as "Big Man Cheese."

2) First to work the job, you must contemplate the execution of a source for which your skills are boastful. This may be not unlimited to such job purchasing items as tilling the supermarket, eating a food, or forming a baby. Often, but not sometimes, persons wishing to compete for the job may seize various sections of a printed newspaper or informational location of the Internet Web.

3) When you wish to engage in competition about one of many forms of job, it is recommended to throw yourself into the location of employment or Internet Web and loudly proclaim "I AM TO WORK THE JOB!" This will make your intention known to the employment officer in charge, so he will not mistake you for a street mime or other known terrorist. The employment officer in charge may challenge you to complete a set of tasks involving paper and pens and not eating either.

4) Following successful uneating of the paper or pens, you will be commanded to honor interrogation opposing the employment officer in charge. According to local customs, the employment officer in charge must be referred at all times as MISTER Big Man Cheese, and all questions shall be answered a random selection of the following provocations: "I AM TO WORK THE JOB!" "ALL WHO RESIST SHALL TASTE MY WRATH!" and "TIIIIIIIIIINNNNN ROOF! RUSTED!"

5) Once you have defeated all opposing combatants to win the struggle for the job, you may find yourself automatically unhappy with the large chunks of soul seeping from the visages in your eyeballs. Do not despair, for you have thrown teeth and nails in battle for the job. It may take a man or person of great intestinal force to work the job, and such man or person is up to twenty-three percent highly more quantifiable to kiss a woman or socialize. Making the job engage most effectively will be definite to please the employment officer in charge, who may reward you with extended visits and unilateral compensation.

If you have considered kissing a woman, working the job is highly suggested to force the acceptance of your kiss and the offering of a date with which to form a baby. Without the reward of working the job the woman you kiss and her date may die out of the starvation and the baby you form may be malformed. Working the job is importamount to the eating of success.

To make them pay; to make them ALL pay.

Otherwise they're shoplifting.

Post the first sentence of the first entry of each month of the previous year. Not the best year for me to try this because I had a very scant year of Journaling. Hopefully 2012 will show a progressively better outlook from month to month as I'm going to attempt to Journal every day. (I may skip some, but it will only be because I'm too busy.)

January
I sometimes feel like people's lives would be better off if I didn't associate with them.

February
Last night, I let Paige pick our dinner.

March
I've been thinking a lot lately about why I can't ever seem to feel content in a relationship.

April is mysteriously absent...

May
I can't believe this picture hasn't been removed from my Photobucket account for violating their terms of service yet.

June
I woke up today missing sex.

July
- They concentrated on older material and didn't neglect their 90's output like they have for the past decade.

August
I am feeling better now than I have for a long time.

September
Ladies and gentlemen, my mother.

October
Being honest with people renders you untrustworthy.

November
"I grew up in a small town and lived in a country all of my life."

December
How to turn a simple mistake into a win.

Mine enemies lain before me.

How to turn a simple mistake into a win.

"The peasants have no bread? Well they should have thought of that before they weren't born rich. Maniacal laugh... Maniacal laaaauuugh..."

If I were to go to an OWS movement, I'd bring a tarp like a Gallagher show. Then I'd be like "What now, bitch—OH FUCK, THEY GOT BATONS!! OH FUCK, OH FUCK!!!"

From the "Ladies And Gentlemen, My Mother" Deparment...



(She meant to post that response under an update of mine about using the lawnmower to collect fallen leaves in the yard.)

Another voice post, because it's been a long time since I've done one, and there's no way this one could be written with the exact amount of frustration—of vehement rage—I wished to express.